Pity Parties Are Part of the Experience – An Entrepreneur’s Addiction
Pity parties are part of the entrepreneurial experience. If you stalk your favorite entrepreneur on social media, you will always hear the awesomeness happening in their lives. You see the success, the money and what seems to be everything you have ever dreamed of for yourself. Some people are stuck in their corporate jobs living their lives vicariously through business coaches, motivational speakers, travel bloggers and cryptocurrency lenders. What you don’t see much of is the other side of entrepreneurship…The painful part that is not sexy or uplifting. Most of your favorite entrepreneurs do not provide transparency regarding their adversity, challenges, and uncertainty. Part of the entrepreneurial experience involves isolation, pity parties, and depression.
Here is my story…
Thanks to a friend and circumstances out of my control, I had to sit still the last 2 days. It started with me being overwhelmed about finances, it turned into being upset about a romantic interest, then it turned into a Tiffany sucks at everything and is a complete failure (all of these things only existed in my head).
That whole spirit was on my back. I realized it’s been there for about week. I was desperately attempting to identify the source of my change in attitude and behavior and it hit me…
I had not been practicing gratitude and kindness. I had not been affirming my desires and the promise of abundance I believe to be within me.
What I had been practicing was impatience. I’d been being tolerant, yet not seeking understanding. Clear cut…I’d been operating in fear, lack, loss, and rejection and any other negative word that holds us down like an anchored balloon meant to fly and soar.
I asked myself, how did I arrive here? For the past year, I’ve been practicing manifesting happiness, living in my truth and I’ve been doing exceptionally well on a daily basis. I stay positive, grateful, prayerful and live in the moment. I speak affirmations, celebrate and express gratitude for who I’ve become, what I’m currently blessed with and the clarity of mind and vision to get where I’m headed in this life and beyond.
This is how I arrived at that uncomfortable roadblock for the last week…
I took a break…I thought I was completely in control. Meaning, I thought my flesh and physical being was in control. I lost my way and dismissed the fact that my mind, body, spirit, and soul MUST align for me to have peace. I allowed my body/flesh to believe it was stronger than everything else. I lost sight of the fact that peace is the GOAL.
I realized the closer I get to realize my dreams, I feel a strong pull towards these words…confidence, courage, patience, and understanding. It’s like I feel the promise of abundance is over the horizon and I KNOW it but I’m hesitant.
What I noticed is that I struggle with maintaining gratitude when business, life, and relationships are NOT going as I planned or prayed for…and instead of seeking understanding I become fearful, impatient and often times behave in a spoiled manner. I feel it coming over me and sometimes I let it envelop me and I marinate in it for a couple of days. This time I realized I sat in a pity pot for a whole week. I went to sleep the last couple of nights feeling different and I didn’t like it. I felt like the old spirit/childhood spirit of Tiffany jumped back in my body and decided to pout, be selfish, be impossible AND be intentionally unhappy.
I woke up this morning…or should I say I rose this morning and I literally felt that negative spirit physically lifted from my body. You see last night, I prayed for it to go away. It was heavy and burdensome, it was painful and chaotic. It was causing me to be sharp, sarcastic and unyielding, all things which give me pause.
My prayer was to remove the heaviness I was experiencing, the doubt, fear, guilt, shame, and expectation…replace it with love and gratitude. I woke up this morning feeling renewed in mind, body, spirit, and soul!
My writing this experience is how I show love for myself and others. If you’ve ever experienced this….maybe my testimony will offer you some comfort. You can overcome doubt and uncertainty. Forgive yourself, seek to understand yourself by strengthing your relationship with yourself (To do this you must consult your higher power). LOVE YOU MORE! Be grateful for you and all that is in you!
I’m sharing this with you because I want you to know that you truly can alter your mood and circumstance with desiring to understand yourself better, gratitude and prayer.
I show gratitude by letting everything in the universe know I appreciate the grand orchestration. I appreciate all things God has done to show me the way back to my best self…the Tiffany he intends me to be. I AM as HE is…my light shines brightly on this day.